It Sucks Being a Man, As Well

We need to kill “bro culture” and discuss toxic masculinity

Jason Weiland
5 min readJun 17, 2019

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I’m a big advocate for equal rights. It’s said that equal rights for others doesn’t mean fewer rights for you, and I feel that wholeheartedly. In this fight for equality, we tend to focus on women, because let’s face it guys, we’ve been feeding women a shit sandwich for a long time now.

Equal rights for others doesn’t mean fewer rights for you. It’s not pie! — author unknown

We force women to deal with a lot more crap than we as men have to deal with. Admit it! But, that’s not what’s stuck in my brain trap today. I heard a story on Facebook about a face painter at a carnival. She talked about a little boy who wanted a butterfly on his face. His mother threw a fit and forced the painter to put a skull and crossbones instead.

It got me thinking about my whole life and the times I’ve come face to face with toxic masculinity.

Photo by Sarah Cervantes on Unsplash

The male standard

My parents were wonderful. I was a weird kid, no doubt about it. I was emotional — I cried a lot. I tended to keep to myself. I didn’t need other kids to play with; my imagination was good enough.

I played with anything I could get my little hands on. Sure, I played war and shot other little boys in the cornfield, but more often than not, I would be at the next-door neighbor’s house playing with Barbies. I’ve attended quite a few tea parties in my life, and girls have used me as a model for their makeup skills.

None of this seemed weird to me because my parents never forced masculinity on me. If I wanted to wear a pink shirt, I wore it. I remember my dad had the most wonderful pink dress shirt and tie. I couldn’t wait until I was old enough to wear it.

Pink is a beautiful color.

I cried at the drop of a hat. I did it everywhere — at home or in public. Never once did my dad seem embarrassed by a son who expressed emotions differently. He never told me to shut up.

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Jason Weiland

Personal essays and articles from a guy who never tires of writing about his life - jasonweiland.substack.com