3 hours agoI Hate Myself Because I Will Never Be NormalBut I also love myself without reserve — I’ve known there was something different about me since I was a kid. I was always moody and brooding. I took things too seriously. I remember always being sad for as long as I remember. And then there was that certain pond from my childhood I knew I could drown…Mental Health4 min read
11 hours agoAn Amazing Relationship is Easy If You…What?Forget the self-help mumbo-jumbo, just do it — I am in my second marriage. My first marriage decayed due to my mental illness, lies, and no communication. I got married again 11 years ago, and for the first 5 years, it was more of the same thing, except for the lies. For some reason, I thought I could…Realtionships4 min read
1 day agoHow to Live Below the Poverty LineWe live in a world of excess, but you don’t have to participate — I’ve been on disability for a long time, so I know a thing or two about living below the poverty line. It helps that I have lived in the Philippines for some time because most things are cheaper here. Even though prices are creeping up for everything just like everywhere…Money4 min read
1 day agoNever Buy Another New Apple Product AgainThis must stop somewhere — let it be with you — I admit I was an Apple Fanboi. I drooled over the news there would be a new MacBook Pro and obsessively read the specs for all the new iPhones. I had plans to buy an Apple Watch, AirPods, and an iPad just for me (my daughter already has one she…Apple4 min read
2 days agoWhy I Canceled My Netflix SubscriptionBottom line: I hadn’t even opened it in 2 months — I used to love Netflix. It all started with 13 Reasons Why and moved on from there. I used to work nights, and when I took a break, I would turn it on real quiet-like so as not to wake my family and watch my favorite shows. At first, I…Netflix4 min read
2 days agoStress is Killing My WifeHer candle is almost spent from burning at both ends — Flora is not handling the pressure well. She has always had an issue with anxiety, but it got out of control after my suicide attempt 5 years ago. I am no psychologist, but it may have been her reaction to the trauma of finding me the next morning half-dead on…Marriage5 min read
3 days agoCan I Go Back to America After All These Years?It’s not exactly the greatest place on earth anymore — The news I get from overseas about the place I grew up has not been good. Since Obama left office, I’ve been concerned for the people I left behind when I came to the Philippines in 2011. Ever since Trump was in office the fascists have come out of the…America4 min read
3 days agoI Never Wanted to Be a Charity CaseAsking for money from strangers on GoFundMe — I’ve never been rich or could even be considered comfortable financially. I’ve been struggling since the day I was born, and I can only name one point in my life where I had enough left at the end of the month for basic necessities. I moved to the Philippines over…Charity5 min read
4 days agoThings Going Through My Head as I Lay DyingKnowing your time on earth is over is a scary thing — During the whole duration of my heart attack drama, there was only one time when the realization that I was probably dying hit me with the full weight of assurance. As the nurses were wheeling me out of the ICU and sending me on my way to the Cath lab…Death5 min read
4 days agoEverything Changes When You Almost DieYou learn what is important in life — As we are wont to do, the wife, Flora, and I were lying in bed last night, talking. We jump from subject to subject just enjoying each other’s company. We talk about our sex life (or lack thereof since the doctor has banned any activity on my part. My wife…Love4 min read
